An Update!

Holy smokes... it's been so long since I've posted. I feel so guilty! I'm trying to take the weekends off now, so maybe I can blog again.

Been up and down a bit, but now back down to 240lbs. Yipee. Still trying to eat 1200-ish calories daily. The food is fine, cutting back is fine... starving for hours each day is SUCKING. I eat lots of low-carb stuff, but it's still getting on my nerves.

ON A GREAT NOTE!!! I have been "approved" for surgery... I say that in quotes because I've been approved by a) the surgeon, b) the dietitian, c) the physiotherapist and d) the psychologist. But now I have to have a psychiatric evaluation... that should be fine cause as far as I know, I'm not nuts. Of course, would I know if I was? LOL! I'm excited, but also a bit frustrated with the system, it takes a very LOOOOONG time to get approved and there always seems to be one more hurdle.

The psychiatrist is supposed to be looking at my history of depression. I was depressed for quite a while in my teen and early 20's right around when the hormones kicked in and then right after I had my son (post-partum perhaps?). I'm not concerned about it because I've been through a lot of stress and frustration lately with my company and I've come to realize that my reaction to everything is the ONLY thing I have control over. So I can always change my circumstances either by a) changing my reaction or b) leaving the situation.

Learning that you DO have control over some things in your life helps you to have understanding when you DON'T have control that something can still be done. At any rate, I'm looking forward to full approval. Perhaps I will see surgery in January '08. The surgeons did ask some interesting questions though... and they seemed to think that my struggle to answer them was a good thing... ie:

"Once you lose the weight do you think you will be happier?" ... I said "uh..... I'm happy now - is that okay?". ;o) Then they asked "More men may show interest in you, will that bother you?"... phfffft! I said "Men hit on me lots now... I don't have a problem with it. Maybe my husband does though!". Then the old "What does your husband think about this?". I said "I think he'd like me to look like Charlize Theron... but he's not Wentworth Miller -- so I think we're already even." They thought those were pretty good answers I guess because I've been approved.

They also said that the hardest of the group to impress was the dietitian ... and that she is very happy with my progress. I just got back from 3.5 weeks vacation and I'd actually LOST 4 LBS!!! Without really trying much, so I guess I've learned something!

Stick with me people -- I'm going to try to blog more once again!